Boating Tips

Boating Tips: Bilges, Buckshot and a Bimbo Called Beatrice

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When was the last time you cleaned out the bilge in your boat? You can’t remember? Well, we have two options for you to consider. It’s a
toss-up really, a heads or tails situation between visiting the mother-in-law for High Tea on the front lawn of her vineyard-lined estate and hearing more about the Heathcoat-Drummonds’ stock market windfall and the rising price of butter lettuce, or, cleaning the bilge.

We’ll let you decide that cleaning an acridsmelling bilge filled with noxious fumes is by far the best and safest option. You might not get the insider-trading tips on certain “winning investments” when you’re busy cleaning the bilge, but at least you won’t have to drink tea while you’re getting the grime in line! On the other hand, Beatrice might decide to bring out the clay pigeon shooting equipment which would offer you the perfect
opportunity for “mistakenly” buckshotting her behind, but that would really irritate your wife and seeing that Beatrice holds the purse strings and the signature to the considerable monies housed in the Horton-Dumont trust fund, butt shooting might not be sporting, or maybe not …

PULL! Honestly, we know High Tea is not in your nature; let’s rather go bilge cleaning!


Most boats are designed so that there is relatively easy access to the bilge. Okay, it might be a tight fit in places, but the builders of the boat had to get the parts in there somehow, so you should be able to gain access to the furthest parts of the bilge. Remember, if your bilge is filthy, oil and fuel leaks will be less evident during inspections.


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